Remaining Loose Like Water, by Ma Deva Uma

SN has lacked sufficient female perspectives for far too long but here’s one woman’s remarkable story (and her views on SN) from Ma Deva Uma, who lives in London.

The first Osho book I read was titled ‘Tantra, The Supreme Understanding.’ That book changed my life forever. It was 1996, and a week after finishing reading the book I handed in my resignation at the London corporate law firm where I had been working for four years. I wanted to be free.

In November of that year it was my twenty-seventh birthday. I decided to treat myself by buying a ticket to Poona. I’d never been to India before and was completely unprepared for what awaited me upon my arrival and subsequent three-day stopover in Mumbai. The city’s air was so polluted that I could hardly breathe and I could not find anything to eat that would not shoot through my digestive system in less than an hour. It was therefore that I spent my first week in Poona in a comfortable hotel room, recovering in bed.

I visited The Resort for the first time on the eleventh of December, Osho’s birthday. I felt like I had arrived in heaven. What a beautiful place, so full of energy. I bought several maroon robes and enrolled in a couple of meditation groups. I was initiated into sannyas and given the wonderful name Ma Deva Uma.

My favourite chill-out spot was by the swimming pool. It did not take long before a handsome swami with light blue eyes set his sights on me. My big nose stops my face from being beautiful, but I do have a very good figure, which must have looked great in a red bikini. His name was Ram and he took me out to dinner one evening and then asked me back to his place. I said, “yes.”

I am an only child who grew up with over-protective parents. My father, now deceased, was a Catholic priest and my mother is a well-respected obstetrician who works in a private practice in London’s Harley Street. The pair of them brainwashed me into believing sex out of marriage was a sin and that it was very dangerous because of STDs. That is why I was still a virgin at the tender age of twenty-seven.

Ram was in his forties and came from Amsterdam in Holland. He was a big man with a huge penis and when I saw it fully erect I was terrified. I told Ram I was a virgin and he smiled and said, “We were all virgins once.” He took me in his arms and soon we were making love. Ram was very good at it and very sensitive. He was gentle with me. I did not want our love-making to end. He left for The Netherlands a week later. I did not mind because I was becoming curious about what it would be like to have sex with different men.

Meanwhile, I had found my power spot. Osho’s Samadhi. To this day I still carry in my heart the profoundly peaceful vibration of that sacred place. During difficult periods in my life I just need to recall how I felt sitting there with my eyes closed and my load loses its gravity. Although I never met Osho in the body he is always with me.

To cut a long and sordid story short, during the next three years, I had sex with at least two hundred men and half a dozen women. My motto was, ‘A few orgasms a day, keeps the doctor away.’ It didn’t. I contracted a nasty strain of gonorrhoea that required a massive amount of antibiotics to cure. That horrid experience brought me to my senses and I stopped having unprotected sex. I found myself with a new problem. I found it impossible to bond on an emotional level. I kept reading Osho books and that helped me come to terms with my situation. I came to understand the difference between being alone and feeling lonely.

I was undergoing a bit of an identity crisis when I talked to a well-travelled girlfriend in London, who told me about a special place she had lived in for two years. I decided to make a drastic quantum leap. I caught a three-hour flight, shaved my long blonde hair off, entered a Buddhist nunnery, took my vows and began living in a hermitage. I stayed there for five years. To live a life of renunciation, celibacy and constant letting go was tremendously challenging. To give an idea of how cut off from the world I was, I did not hear about 9/11 until three years after it happened.

In 2008, I met my husband for the first time, while attending a talk by a famous Advaita teacher in Hampstead. Today, I live in an apartment in north London with my husband and three children. I have a bookcase in the living room which is home to over 300 Osho books. I have read them all and my favourite is still the first one I read, ‘Tantra, The Supreme Understanding’.

By now, you might well be wondering why I am sharing all this. Let me explain. Over the past few years, I have been a constant visitor to Sannyas News. It became a kind of guilty pleasure for me, to read all the crazy and interesting things sannyasins write on this site. During the past two years, most of my favourite writers have left, but I still read the articles and comments, although there is not as much wicked humour as there once was. I have to say that there is rarely anything written by a woman. This signals that something has gone wrong because Osho was very much in favour of the feminine. The master always had women running the show while he was still in the body. Now it is rare for even dear Kavita to put in an appearance here on Sannyas News, which is a great pity because she has such a charming Induan way of putting things in her down-to-earth, feminine way.

What is my message? I think the male members of Sannyas News need to move over and make space for some female commentators. That way Osho’s work will be furthered by giving a more balanced impression that includes the feminine. I leave you with one of my favourite Osho quotes:

Consciousness needs freedom. Be loose; remember this word as deeply as possible. Let it penetrate you. Be loose, so in every situation, you can flow easily, water-like, as when water is poured into a glass, it takes the shape of the glass. It doesn’t resist, it doesn’t say, “This is not my form.” If the water is poured into a jar, into a jug, it takes the shape of that. It has no resistance; it is loose. Remain loose like water.”

Osho,Tantra: The Supreme Understanding












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114 Responses to Remaining Loose Like Water, by Ma Deva Uma

  1. Nityaprem says:

    Wonderful, and well written too! Going to shut up now, making space for the Mas.

  2. Lokesh says:

    ‘The Supreme Understanding’? I remember buying that book in the ashram bookshop back in 1970-something. It left a strong impression at the time. Even today I can remember parts of it…

    Some bossy geezer called Tilopa orders an apprentice called Niropa to build a house out of cut rock. Niropa labours away under the hot sun and through several cold winters to build a cottage. After several long years, the house is ready. It is perfect. Niropa gets hold of Tilopa and asks him to come and inspect the building project. Tilopa passes by, glances at the house and orders Niropa to demolish the place and return all the rocks to where they had come from and leave no traces that the house ever existed. Niropa gets busy with a sledgehammer. I think that is what you call the good old days.

    Now in the good new days, we have Ma Deva Uma. Let’s see now. She was a twenty-seven-year-old virgin who reads the above-mentioned book, packs in her job and flies off to The Resort, loses her virginity, gets shagadelic to the max, becomes a nymphomaniac, gets the clap, becomes a celibate nun and then finds a nice hubby and has three kids in London, where they are now, presumably, going with the flow and living happily ever after. Really, man, you could not make it up.

    Uma thinks SN lacks the feminine touch and this is preventing the site from furthering Osho’s work…whatever that is. I have to agree that there is a distinct lack of women on SN. It does not require a genius to see that. There are not any women here. Why is that do you think? I doubt the boys moving over and letting the girls take over will ever happen. Nonetheless, I enjoyed Uma’s article and appreciate the sentiments she voiced.

    • Nityaprem says:

      Well, it’s definitely true there aren’t many women on SN. It is always nice when Kavita drops by, so I am sure some more female commentators would liven up the pages.

      It’s true that some of the funniest and also most sincere of the old commenters have left. Frank, Anand Yogi are definitely missed. But I thought when I came here you needed a fairly thick skin to cope with the SN comments pages… people like Swamishanti who occasionally goes off the deep end with sexual commentary, or Veet Francesco who talks about shitting on Osho’s chair. Also the various bits of infighting like between you, Lokesh, and Arpana.

      If you are used to a Buddhist forum where everyone practiSes right speech, it’s a bit of a shock and can be somewhat off-putting. I was wondering if this might not put off female commentators.

      • swamishanti says:

        “Swamishanti who occasionally goes off the deep end with sexual commentary…”

        Really, NP, I don’t know what you mean unless you are used to Buddhist forums. I have sometimes shared songs from artists like Lady Saw: ‘I Want to Fuck You With My Heels On’.
        Lady Saw is known as the ‘Dancehall Queen’ who is very open with her sexual commentary, which is a perfectly normal thing in Jamaican ragga culture you know.

        Sometimes I’ve also shared tracks from Eek-a-mouse, Beenieman, Yellowman, Lee Perry, Dub Syndicate, African Headcharge , Linton Kwesi Johnson and others from the UK/Jamaican musical culture. Singing openly about sex is a ‘ting’ in dat environment you know, even amongst highly spiritual religious Rastas, who will enjoy singing openly without shame about their sex lives and preferences in their conscious ragga, even if they sing about sex with multiple partners.

        Polygamy is quite common amongst Rastafarian’s. Bob Marley fathered eleven children with multiple partners including three with his wife Rita, and adopted Rita’s daughter with another man when he married Rita. But they did both have extramarital affairs.

        Bob had eight children with eight other women apart from Rita, while Rita later had two more children with two other men while still married to Bob.

        “Sexual intercourse is a lovely thing.” Bob Marley

        “It’s a natural thing, Jamaican men have a thing where they want more than one woman, and more than one pickney,” Rita Marley.

        Bob Marley and the Wailers: Kinky Reggae :

        From the album ‘Catch A Fire’. A album which is worth listening to at least once in a persons lifetime. And if you listen to that one you might as well listen to ‘Burnin’, ‘Natty Dread’ , ‘Exodus’, ‘Rastaman Vibration’, ‘Survival’, ‘Uprising’, ‘Kaya’.. there all very good.

        Bob Marley and the Wailers are one of those quality acts where all of their albums are worth listening to.
        Healthy expression of sexuality can also go perfectly well with superconsciousness, this also happens in Rastafarianism as well as tantra.
        This very different from some of the sexual repressive attitudes from other religions conditionings. Some of the Rastas are very superconscious, make excellent music, and like the African spiritual tribal elders or Native American medicine men, are not sexually inhibited.

        The Osho Meditation Resort is not a knocking shop.

        As far as the article is concerned I thought it looked more like an April Fools Day joke rather than an Osho birthday joke. And it’s not Hanukah or Christmas.

        But yes, Kavita occasionally drops by. There are rarely any women.

        Years ago, before 2010, long before Anand Yogi, there were women commentators but it was a different energy on the site, without all the ‘gullible’ and ‘delusional’, ‘it’s all a fantasy’, ‘it’s all a con’, ‘suggestibility’, hypnosis, anti-cult stuff, real sannyasins with a few ex too. All of those have long left.

        I remember a female commentator wrote in during the Covid pandemic an earnest post about her shamanic work she was doing and was quickly told she was basically ‘fantasising’, her work rubbish, delusional, etc.
        This wasn’t encouraging for her and she left no comment and didn’t come back.

        I remember another sannyasin lady commentator, Levina, wrote “this is obviously not an Osho site”, and was put off and left too.
        And I remember Chetna, from the Loveosho podcasts, being told in one comment that she was delusional too, and she left.


        • Lokesh says:

          Shanti says, “As far as the article is concerned I thought it looked more like an April Fools Day joke rather than an Osho birthday joke. And it’s not Hanukah or Christmas.”

          It is precisely because of comments like this that female sannyasins turn away from SN. Uma’s article sounds sincere enough to me, albeit a little extreme for Shanti’s conservative taste, and the point she addresses about a lack of female input on the site is indeed relevant. After all, Shanti’s main input is posting links to corny retro music that nobody is interested in. Now, when a woman posts a decent enough article describing her sannyas journey, Shanti writes it off as a joke. No wonder female sannyasins are turned off by the site when men like Shanti post sexist remarks that also come across as completely insensitive.

          • Nityaprem says:

            I don’t think you can put it entirely down to Swamishanti though. He mentions quite a few cases where sannyasin women were not treated well by the SN community, which seem to creep under the radar of moderation.

            If you were to tell me that I’m delusional, I probably wouldn’t take it that seriously and might come back with “Well, like, that’s just your opinion, dude” (to quote ‘The Big Lebowski’). But a lot of women I know are significantly more sensitive.

            It’s a thing with the Internet, where speech is the primary mode of interaction and not a sly wink and a smile. I’m not quite sure what we might do about this, other than tighten up the moderation of comments directed at women who do choose to visit.

  3. kavita says:

    Wonderful to see your article DU (Deva Uma),! I can relate in more than one way with you!

    DU writes: “During the past two years, most of my favourite writers have left, but I still read the articles and comments, although there is not as much wicked humour as there once was. I have to say that there is rarely anything written by a woman. This signals that something has gone wrong because Osho was very much in favour of the feminine.The master always had women running the show while he was still in the body.” 

    Yes, dear, even I felt this long time ago, guess it’s existential, perhaps this can be seen in Osho’s Sannyas World all over the globe, all I can say is probably these women are conserving their energy for what’s essential for them, at this moment!

    DU says: “What is my message? I think the male members of Sannyas News need to move over and make space for some female commentators. That way Osho’s work will be furthered by giving a more balanced impression that includes the feminine.” 

    What you say is perhaps idealistic or perhaps an Existential Expression to all the masculine alpha males of Osho’s Sannyas World to slow down! 

    Disclaimer: I am not a feminist in any which way.

    • Nityaprem says:

      They are probably all taking care of aging, cantankerous sannyasin males. Snigger.

      But it’s a thing, because women tend to live longer they often end up caring for their men. I saw this in my family where my aunts were caring for my uncles, who both recently died of cancer. The aunts are now grieving, left behind with just the kids and grandkids.

  4. satchit says:

    Interesting topic, Uma.

    Certainly there have been more women here (Madhu!).

    In my opinion it is not only a thing of the body, but also of the mind:
    There are women who have a male mind (Sheela) and there are men who have a female mind (Ram). Huge penis and female mind (Good combination :) .

    • VeetTom says:

      Sex comes in – as a memory – watching the dirty old man just like Osho predicted it. I liked the words of Uma mentioning that big cock that shocked her at first sight. So understandable for jealous small pricks like me. In the end, becoming an old fart, I connected with women coming close enough to me that werw not looking and feeling attractive to me, but the emotional hunger for cozy friendship was there…impossible to get an erection at all…but there were no other women around so this chance was to be taken without escape or chance to other more activating erotic challenges.

      If spiritual search for healthy living may pop up again next life – which seems to be logical as far as Osho quotes do promise – I will have to restart that search for true love and stuff. Self-acceptance therapy was not enough this time. Intellectual stories of higher understanding won’t help a bit. So ends my disillusioned Sannyas Story without glorious old age fulfillment.

      And now something completely different….

  5. Nityaprem says:

    I liked Deva Uma’s sannyas story a lot though. Us “old” sannyasins don’t get to hear so many stories from the younger crowd who visited The Resort after Osho’s death, and what brings them to Osho is also interesting.

    I hope you still found something of the original sannyas spirit, which taught people not to care too much about money and pensions but instead to follow your heart. For me that is a lesson I am still learning, to be free and to put my energy into things that give me joy.

    I think Osho’s words still have things to teach the younger generations, in many ways he was ahead of his time. Although I don’t have such a big collection of physical books I enjoy reading the PDFs from, and I am so glad his words are freely available.

    Good for you Deva Uma that you found your sexual energy, and that you enjoyed your time at The Resort.

    • Lokesh says:

      I agree with most of your above post, NP. What I do not agree with is “the original sannyas spirit, which taught people not to care too much about money and pensions but instead to follow your heart.”

      Money might not buy you love but it is a pain in the ass not having it, especially when one gets older. Osho taught not to become dependent on state handouts and that his people should be able to support themselves financially in the world. We have to become self-reliant on all levels.

      I know many sannyasins who are struggling financially. Some of them are wonderful people. They followed their hearts for most of their lives and did not use their heads enough to make a living, and now they are paying for it. It is hard to focus on the spiritual when not having enough money to pay the rent. Osho always took care of business and charged money for what he had to offer on many levels, setting a good example.

      • Nityaprem says:

        Osho wasn’t a businessman though. “Be realistic; plan for a miracle!” is the opposite of the mentality that takes you to sound financial planning for a career and a pension. And Ma Deva Uma also quit her (presumably well-paid) job at a London law firm to go to Poona, as did many sannyasins at the Ranch and in the communes.

        I agree it’s a bummer not having money, but we don’t actually need anything more than food, shelter and clothes of a modest sort. It makes you treasure the few luxuries that you have a bit more, but that too is only attachment.

        If you choose to spend time as a sannyasin following Osho or as a Buddhist nun you will end up with some gaps on your CV. A certain amount of risk-taking comes with the territory, and Osho often said as much.

        • Lokesh says:

          A businessman is by definition a man who works in commerce, especially at an executive level.

          Osho sat in executive chairs, drove a Rolls Royce, wore expensive watches and clothes, lived in a big house, and charged money for his discourses, meditations and therapy groups. In Oregon, when seeing his disciples laying flowers on the bonnet of his limousine, he suggested to his secretary to open a flower shop. Osho never had to touch money as such, a sign of being truly wealthy. I think he enjoyed being the boss of a huge money-making enterprise and I do not see anything wrong with that. Osho was all in favour of luxury and was well aware that luxury requires money to fund it.

          “Capitalism gives you the freedom to be yourself; that’s why I support it.” (Osho)

          • satchit says:

            “I am not a one-sided person. I am neither for the inner nor for the outer, I am for both together. One has to be rich inside and one has to be rich outside too. Richness is beautiful; outer richness is beautiful just as inner richness is beautiful. Nothing is wrong in creating money.”

            Osho, ‘Philosophia Ultima’, #12

          • Nityaprem says:

            Yes, very good, Osho was for richness. But often he was for his own brand of communism too. I think there is a discussion to be had about sannyas and earning money, some ways of making money are difficult to unite with a spiritual life.

          • swamishanti says:

            Well, Osho said the Rolls Royces were “for the idiots”, and to those who see Osho as a businessman who made it his life`s mission to collect Rolls Royces then good luck to you is all I can say.
            He did look good covered in bling though. Which I prefer to those old bald head pictures. I`m not much of a fan of Rollers myself. Personally I prefer the Delorean.

            Lokesh, you missed out part of the quote again:

            “Capitalism gives you the freedom to be yourself; that’s why I support it. My support has reasons behind it. I am not supporting it as an economic phenomenon; there is much more involved in my support. And to my understanding, capitalism will bring a socialism of its own kind as a by-product.”

            ‘Come, Come, Come, Yet Again Come’ (1980)

            “Capitalism arose out of the system of feudalism. And if capitalism is allowed to develop fully, it will lead to socialism. And socialism, allowed to run its full course, will turn into communism. And in the same way communism can lead to anarchism. But the basic condition is that these systems should be allowed to evolve fully, completely. But a child can be forced prematurely out of its mother’s womb, and the mother may feel tempted to have a child sooner than later. An impatient mother may want to have the child in five months, instead of nine; she will escape four months of labor and see her child earlier. But such a child will be a dead child, not a living one. And even if the child survives, it will be worse than dead….

            Remember, if capitalism is developed properly, socialism will be its natural outcome–in a pregnancy of nine months the child comes out of its mothers womb naturally and silently.

            So, talk of socialism when capitalism has not yet grown to its full height, is suicidal.
            I am myself a socialist, so it will surprise you when I ask you to beware of socialism.

            I also want the child of socialism to come to India, but on one condition: that it completes its full nine months in the mother’s womb. This country has not achieved capitalism as yet. So talk of socialism here at this moment is as dangerous…as dangerous as it proved in Russia, and is going to be proved in China. China is out to kill millions, and yet socialism will not come there, because nothing in life happens before its time. The law of life does not permit haste. This country has yet to develop its capitalist system….

            What do I mean when I warn you against socialism? I ask you to let the time of pregnancy be complete. Capitalism is that time of pregnancy – let it complete nine months….

            If I warn you against socialism, it does not mean that I am the enemy of socialism.
            Many people find contradictions in what I say. But what I say is so simple, so clear. I repeat: Socialism will stem from capitalism if the latter is allowed its full growth.”

            Osho: ‘Beware of Socialism’ (1970)

            “Socialism can only come after the full development of capitalism. Socialism will be like a fruit on the tree of capitalism. And if socialism develops rightly, then a social condition may arise in which equality and the good of all will happen. One may call it sarvodaya and another may call it communism — names dont make a difference. The road does not go from sarvodaya to socialism. but from socialism to sarvodaya; and no socialism is possible without developing capitalism.”

            Osho: ‘Beware of Socialism’ (1970)

            “I am all for richness – but the richness will be of the commune. As the commune becomes richer, every individual will become richer. I am against poverty, I am not a worshiper of poverty. I don’t see anything spiritual in being poor; it is sheer stupidity. Neither poverty is spiritual, nor sickness is spiritual, nor hunger is spiritual. A commune should live in such a way that it becomes richer and richer, in such a way that it does not produce too many children, that it does not overproduce people, because overproduction of people is bound to create beggars, is bound to create orphans. And once there are orphans there are Mother Teresas to convert them into Catholicism.

            All the communes should be interdependent, but they will not exchange money. Money should be dissolved. It has done tremendous harm to humanity – now it is time to say goodbye to it, because money can be accumulated. And if one commune becomes richer than the other communes, then comes from the back door the poverty and the richness and the whole nightmare of capitalism, and the classes of the poor and the rich, and the desire to dominate. Because you are rich, you can enslave other communes. Money is one of the enemies of man.”

            Osho: ‘The Golden Future’ (1987)

            “I am absolutely anti-political. Deep down I am an anarchist. My ultimate goal finally is that there should be a humanity without any government. Government is a condemnation of every one of us. The very existence of the government and the police and the army shows that we are still not civilized.”

            Osho: ‘Satyam Shivam Sundram’ (1987)

            “So communism is a first step. The second step is spiritualism, and the third step is anarchism. Anarchism is not possible unless people are really, authentically spiritual. Prince Kropotkin, Tolstoy, Bakunin; all were unaware of the fact that they were talking about the flowers but they had forgotten about the roots and the trunk. You cannot create flowers without roots, without a trunk. Communism is just the roots, and the trunk will be meditation.

            And the flowers will be a world without any domination, without any interference with individual growth; — a world without states, a world without boundaries. Just a world consisting of individuals — not organizations, not nations, not races. These are the three steps, and I can see them clearly because I have no identification with anything — neither communism nor spiritualism nor anarchism. I am just a witness.”

            Osho: ‘Communism and Zen Fire, Zen Wind’ (1989)

            • swamishanti says:

              In ‘The Ideal of Human Unity’, Sri Aurobindo advocated for the nation state to be replaced with a form of anarchy, based on voluntary associations between “free individuals” and the principle of “unity in diversity”.

              “The anarchic is the true divine state of man in the end as in the beginning; but in between it would lead us straight to the devil and his kingdom.”
              ― Sri Aurobindo

            • Lokesh says:

              Gee whizz! One day, when I grow up, I want to be a big time copy and paster like Shanti.

            • Nityaprem says:

              Nevertheless Swamishanti’s quote does show that Osho’s vision went much farther than just a simplistic “capitalism is good”, and I think SS is right to point out that it is not as straightforward as that.

              The current mode of capitalism is leading to a small elite, the top 1% of wealth-owning families which dominate politics behind the scenes and the lawmaking through the buying of influence. In Europe it is a bit less visible than in America. It is not a good thing, and the middle class is shrinking in many countries. Read ‘Capital in the 21st Century’ by Thomas Piketty.

              In mental health care too we are seeing rising incidence of serious conditions, a lot of which can be traced back to the toxic influence of current culture, especially in the USA but also in Europe and Canada and other developed countries. I’d recommend reading ‘The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture’ by Gabor Mate.

              There is a lot wrong with just simple capitalism, and Osho knew it.

              • Lokesh says:

                There is a lot wrong in this world if you want to see it that way. Some would say the world is perfect as it is.

                One could also say that human perception is so limited we really do not have a clue what is really taking place on this planet. We believe the world to be objective, while it might actually be a projection of our psyche. As you believe so the world will appear about sums it up. This does not mean that I see things like Israel committing genocide in Gaza as not having anything wrong about it. It means that there may be much taking place behind the scenes that we have no understanding of.
                For example, Gurdjieff’s’ Food for the Moon hypothesis is derived from vibrations generated by intense human experiences such as fear and hate which formulate unique energies on the collective level which create war and other human tragedies. We could compare this to mass hypnosis of humankind on earth in order to feed the Moon.

              • Nityaprem says:

                I don’t think Osho ever advised seeing the world as a projection of your mind. He said many things but I never heard him say that. I think it encouraged too much of a mind-centric view of the universe.

                One thing Nisargadatta said which stuck with me: “Just as the colours in this carpet are brought out by light but light is not the colour, so is the world caused by you but you are not the world.” I thought it was a beautiful analogy which seemed to carry a hint of the truth.

                And while I like the clarity of science I can also see the depth of the mythological perspective. In a way the shaman with his fire, drums, songs and stories is more valid as a way of addressing the human experience than mathematics.

                • Lokesh says:

                  NP, you must have missed the billboard on the Amsterdam Ring…

                • Nityaprem says:

                  That’ll teach me to ever say, “I don’t think Osho said that”. He clearly said so many things that you might well be disproven whatever it is…

                • satchit says:

                  “Your whole world is in your mind. Or rather, your whole world is your mind – nothing else exists.

                  Whatsoever you see is a projection. Whatsoever you feel is also a projection. That’s why Hindus have always been saying that the world is illusory. It is a mirage, it appears but it is not there. And how can this illusion be transcended?

                  If you can understand it as an illusion, you are already on the way to transcending it. If a dream is realized as a dream, you are already moving away from it, you are awakening.

                  The world that you see is not the reality, because the reality can be seen only when there is no mind.

                  With a mind in between, the reality cannot be seen – it is coloured. You project your mind on it – it becomes a screen.”


            • teema says:


              I had always looked at the Rolls Royces and the watches as a form of pre-Internet advertisement.

              In 2023, we have YouTube, Facebook, and all manner of ways to get our message out.

              In 1980, no such luck, so if you wanted people to hear about you, and if the mainstream media was doing their best to not cover you, you had to be big, you had to be controversial, you had to be worth talking about (even if it was negative – no such thing as bad press, etc.). And that is exactly what Bhagwan did, and that is why he had Sheela play hard ball. Controversy got eyeballs, and eyeballs brought more people to him. He was larger than life, he was controversial, he was “The Sex Guru” and all other manner of attention-getting things. And I think you needed that more back in those days than you do now.

              And to be clear, I’m not disagreeing with you, just adding more to that thought. :)

              • swamishanti says:

                Hi Teema,

                Your view of the Rollers is one echoed by some sannyasins, a Swami Anand Veeresh, for example, a Swami Amrito who used to write on here years back, and lives and runs a meditation centre in Canada, apparently named after Osho’s doctor by his parents.

                Others will tell you the Rollers were like the Sufi device of ‘Malamatiya’, which is ‘the art of attracting dissaproval’. Ma Prem Shunyo wrote that Osho was using sufi disguise in her book.

                Osho spoke a lot about “the new commune” (which ended up in the US as Rajneeshpuram) in the years leading up to his public silence, and gave certain hints that devices would be employed in the new commune to make sure that only the real seekers, who were really interested in him, would want to come into the new commune and stay with him.

                And Osho often spoke about various devices used by Masters to both attract and dispell, to find ‘his people’ whom he could work intimately with.

                Many people were put off by the Rolls, and that served Osho’s work well, it was also useful for him to lose some people, ‘weed people out’ as it were.

                “whenever Osho made another U-turn, another group of people would fall out the back of the van….” (Osho’s doctor Amrito from ‘rebellious spirit’ podcast).

                He also said that he found a certain freedom in dropping respectability, which is what Malamatiya really means as well.
                Part of him had no desire to be really respectable in the eyes of the society.

                With the Rollers Osho also challenged the traditional idea that enlightenment had to be accompanied by poverty and demonstrated that the material world did not have to be shunned, could be accompanied perfectly well with spirituality.

                This was a new thing that many with the old religious conditionings are still not able to accept.

                As well as this, others will say he was taking the piss out of the Americans with the Rollers , like a spoof of American consumerism. Yet , for those long term disciples with the other explanations , they will all agree that Osho used various devices at various points in time.

                He spoke about many of these various things when speaking on the Rolls, and pointed out that for some who were turned off him, the Rollers were more important than the desires for enlightenment.

                So perhaps it was a mixture of all these things.

                And then there is the less common view expressed by a few sannyasins that Osho knew that Rajneeshpuram would collapse and accepted the Rolls as gifts, as he knew that they could be sold and they would need more money in the future for the new commune project when the time came to leave the US.

                • swamishanti says:

                  A couple of quotes on the Rollers:

                  “So I have not given any excuse for my people to be around me. In fact, I have given them every excuse to escape from me, to avoid me. Being with me does not bring you respectability. That was well considered by me from the very beginning, that with me you should have to lose your respect, your honour, your morality. These will be the tests whether you are going to risk anything to be with me. And if thousands of people have decided to be with me at any cost, that is a determination, a commitment of tremendous import. That means they have tasted something of my presence.
                  The people who are now around me are not here just for my words. By now they are perfectly aware that you can play with the words, there is nothing in it. They are perfectly aware that they are not to cling to my words, because tomorrow I am going to change. Why cling unnecessarily? I am absolutely unreliable. And to trust in a man who is so unreliable is authentic trust. It goes beyond thinking of consequences. It goes beyond fear. It goes beyond all words. I may contradict, I may say anything, it does not matter to my people. What matters is my presence, my love towards them, their love towards me.”

                  (OSHO: ‘The Last Testament’ – 1984)

                  “In the new commune I am going to make it such that only those who are really daredevils will be able to enter into it. A thousand and one things will prevent them, because those are the people who, even if they come in, they will go out. So why waste time on them? It is better to keep them out, bracket them out.”
                  OSHO: ‘The Wisdom of the Sands’, Vol 2 (1978)

                  “It is part of my whole device to change the very structure of human consciousness.
                  The past has revered poverty, asceticism, masochistic attitudes.
                  A man was respected if he was renouncing all that is pleasant, all that is comfortable.
                  He was respected for torturing himself; the greater the torture, the greater the respect.
                  The whole human past is masochistic, and all the religions have contributed to this insanity.
                  My effort is to change such a vast past and its influence. So it has been only a device. I have not been creating desires for materialistic things in people; they are there without anybody’s creating them.
                  Yes, they have been repressed so deeply that people have even forgotten that they had them. I am not creating them; I simply want to remove the cover-up, the repression, and to make the person realize that he wants a Rolls Royce more than enlightenment.
                  This realization will be a basic step towards enlightenment, because it will make him aware of his own reality, his greed.
                  There was no need for ninety-three Rolls Royces. I could not use ninety-three Rolls Royces simultaneously – the same model, the same car.
                  But I wanted to make it clear to you that you would be ready to drop all your desires for truth, for love, for spiritual growth to have a Rolls Royce.
                  I was knowingly creating a situation in which you would feel jealous. The function of a master is very strange. He has to help you come to an understanding of your inner structure of consciousness: it is full of jealousy.

                  A deep unconsciousness, a great blindness exists, and I am fighting against a mountainous unconsciousness, darkness.
                  Naturally they will be very much annoyed.
                  They would have loved me, they would have worshipped me.
                  And it was so easy for me to do what they wanted, but then I would have been continuing the old misery, the old disease, the old stupidity.

                  I decided to be unrespectable, but not to help any nonsensical value.“

                  (OSHO: ‘The Last Testament’ – 1984)

          • VeetTom says:

            UG Krishnamurti wrote:

            “Money matters most in life.

            Be not shy about money-making.

            Trust not anyone with money.

            Nothing is free in this world, not even love.

            One who worships the money god will be amply rewarded. One who worships the other God will be stripped naked and left in the streets.

            Make money by hook or by crook.

            Make money by any means.

            Money talks; wealth whispers.

            Miss not a chance to make money.

            Quench not the thirst for money.

            Money is the only thing that works.

            Yes is for money and no is for everything else.

            Money is the only visible support for life.

            Money is the be all and end all of our existence.

            Money is the only thing that will put you into the life of luxury.

            Money is the word of the day.

            One who does not exploit his assets to make money must be a damn fool.

            Money should be the highest on your agenda.

            One who does not stash and cash money must needs be a dunderhead.

            Money is the root on which every flower blooms.

            Sweat not and swear not to make money.

            Not darling dearies, but money is what counts most in life.

            Love money more than thyself.

            Unless converted into money, name and fame are not worth a tinkers damn.

            Making money is the finest of arts to be practiced.

            Maximize the money talk. Minimize the love talk.

            Better be miserable with loads of money than be without it.

            Worship not anything but money.

            Offer not prayers to anybody but to money.

            Out with love. In with money.

            Denying yourself money is the root of all misery.

            Better bask in the glow and the glare of money than in the sun.

            Part not with money.

            Leaveth not a penny for others.

            The demand for material goodies is the only thing that prayers should answer.

            Shut your mouth, open your wallet.

            Blessed indeed are the money-ed.

            Cursed indeed are those who maketh not money.

            Passions and propensities count not. What counts most is money.

            Make others sweat. Enjoy the fruits thereof.

            Maximize the art of money-making.

            Charmeth your life with money.

            Stop liking darling dearies. Start loving money-making guys.

            Money-making malevolence is the only thing needed in this world.

            Better be brave to boost up money than benevolent.

            Better be money-greedy than money-needy.

            Cash on the barrel breaketh all the barriers in life.

            Better be a moneysmith than a wordsmith.

            Love not anything but money.

            A fistful of money is the only thing that taketh care of all your needs.

            Put no limits on money.

            Without money, nothing happens.

            Put everything on money and let it ride.

            There is no place for anything but money in life.

            The lack of money leadeth you nowhere.

            Loads of money leadeth you to the land of milk and honey.

            The easy way of making money is the only art to be practiced.

            Feel not funny when it comes to money.

            What else is there to do than to make money?

            Money always wins.

            It is not moneylessness but moneyfullness that betters life.

            Sharing money is no means to caring for people.

            No dough no go.

            What brightens life is a pocketful of money.

            Share not money.

            What is it that money cannot buy? Even God.

            Thinketh, maketh, willeth and speaketh of not anything but money.

            Nothing else buys love but money.

            Marry not maidies but money.

            Not God but money is the one that mightily and sweetly ordereth all things.

            Money tops the list of all needs.

            Put money where it belongs—your pocket.

            Money makes money.

            Let money roll in.

            Make money the one and the only thing in life.

            No money, no honey.

            The money-making path is the matchless one.

            It is money that fulfils all and every goal in life.

            The thicker the wallet, the grander the life.

            The only key that unlocks every door is money.

            Money is the only artful life. Not the dull, dreary, drab life of denying money.

            The most boring man on earth is one who knows not how to make loads of money.

            Sing not any songs but songs of money.

            Money-making must be the ultimate goal of life.

            He who thinks not of money needs must be a low-grade moron.

            Breathe not anything but the breath of money.

            Punish not robbers, thieves or stealers of money.

            Twiddle not your thumbs but thumb wads and wads of money.

            The more moola you have, the merrier life will be.

            Moola is the ruler of life.

            One who parts with money freely and easily must be a damn fool.

            Heck with charity.

            Wallow in wealth.

            The jingling of money is the most melodious sonata.

            Be a fatsy moneywise and not otherwise.

            Take the dough and hit the road.

            Money goodies are better than gaudy godies.

            Believe not anyone who talks against money.

            What matters most is not monism but moneyism.

            Speaketh not anything but money. Thinketh not anything but money. Willeth not anything but money.”

        • Nityaprem says:

          I had a chat about this with my father, we experienced a lot of the early commune together, including Poona 1 and the Ranch, and he mentioned the unique atmosphere of brotherhood, of being with so many other spiritually aligned people who had, to use Tim Leary’s phrase, “turned on, tuned in and dropped out”.

          It was temporary, just as Deva Uma’s time as a Buddhist nun was temporary, and then finding a way back into working society is tricky.

  6. satchit says:

    “Remain loose like water.”

    Writing an article is one jug, commenting is another.

  7. Lokesh says:

    Yes, NP, that is why saying “Osho says” repeatedly is a pretty dumb mantra. Of course, it is all right to use the occasional Osho quote to make a point. To take what Osho said as some sort of gold standard in the spiritual verbal world is strictly for the numpties.

    • Nityaprem says:

      But what do you do when you find out the numpties are happier and more fulfilled and more joyful? It reminds me of the time psychologists did a study and found out that very intelligent people earn something like 10% more than the norm but are not any happier.

      • Lokesh says:

        Only a numpty believes money will make you happy as a direct consequence of having it. Then again, certain wealthy individuals exude something that can be mistaken for some form of enlightenment. Of course, it isn’t. It is just that the wealthy do not have to worry about money the same way as poor people do.

        In Keith Richards’ autobiography he says, “Everyone enjoys making money.” To a large extent I would say that is true.

    • Nityaprem says:

      Still, it’s a sannyasin news site, so what are we going to discuss besides what Osho said? Seems totally fair to me…

  8. Lokesh says:

    “What are we going to discuss besides what Osho said?”

    There are a million and one things to be discussed, besides what Osho said.

    For example, this morning I was practising being aware that ‘I am’. It is very difficult to keep that up for very long, even though it is very important. One minute you are in the street, trying to be aware of yourself, and next thing you know you are back home drinking a cup of coffee, completely unaware of your presence for the past two hours and where you were during that time..

    • Nityaprem says:

      Yes, that was the famous story by PD Ouspensky in his book ‘In Search of the Miraculous’ where he was practising Gurdjieff’s self-remembering, repeating to himself: “Ouspensky is crossing the street…Ouspensky is walking along the sidewalk…oh, wait, there is the tobacconist where I had wanted to buy x” and finding the next time he recalled self-remembering was back at home later in the afternoon.

      For me, being aware seems to have something to do with tempo and activity. If I am trying to do things quickly, I often get dragged along by my thoughts, whereas when I am sitting or laying down it is easier to be relaxed and slow and aware.

      • Lokesh says:

        During the first half of the 1900s, Mr O was a pioneer in the West. The idea of self-remembering a novel one at the time. Self-remembering does not have anything to do with inner dialogue because that is something that has to be observed also. Therefore Mr O talking to himself, “Ouspensky is crossing the street…Ouspensky is walking along the sidewalk…”, sounds like the actions of a novice. It must be remembered that Ouspensky studied the Gurdjieff system directly under Gurdjieff’s own supervision for a period of ten years, from 1915 to 1924. ‘In Search of the Miraculous’ recounts what he learned from Gurdjieff during those years. Ouspensky personally confessed the difficulties he was experiencing with ‘self-remembering’. It is a deep state of mindfulness in the present moment, whatever one is doing.

        The present phraseology in the teachings of Advaita is to be in awareness, or being aware of being aware. It is consistent with the Buddhist practice of ‘mindfulness’. ‘Self-remembering’ was a technique to which he had been introduced by Gurdjieff himself. Gurdjieff explained to him that self-remembering is the missing link to everything else. Indisputably brilliant in his own right, Ouspensky is nevertheless best remembered because of another man’s brilliance.

        In 1947, the aged, tired, sick Ouspensky held a series of six question-and-answer sessions in London where he told his followers flatly that he had failed. His System didn’t work. It was a lie. There wasn’t any higher truth. They should go home and find themselves. He was hostile and uncommunicative. Shortly after, on the 2nd October, he died.

        I read somewhere that Mr O was an alcoholic in later life and died a somewhat frustrated and bitter man. Nonetheless, he did great things in his life and blazed a path for others to follow.

        Today, we have much more access to spiritual information than people did during Mr O’s time. A good example would be the teachings of Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj. In his book ‘I Am That’ Nisargadatta explains how his guru taught him to abide with the ‘I Am’ and how this soon brought him to enlightenment. Abiding with the ‘I Am’ does not mean constantly telling oneself ‘I Am’, but rather just being present to the fact.

        ‘Self-remembrance, awareness of ‘I am’ ripens man powerfully and speedily. Give up all ideas about yourself and simply be. Stop making use of your mind and see what happens. Do this one thing thoroughly. That is all.’

        (Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj)

        • Nityaprem says:

          Interesting stuff about Ouspensky. I’d add that Ouspensky left Gurdjieff’s school and set up on his own, the result was his ‘System’. Whether Gurdjieff’s teachings ever successfully produced another awakened human being I’ve never heard.

          I like your Nisargadatta quote, Lokesh, it reminds me of a Mooji guided meditation I came across which said to focus on your “sense of being”. That was the first time in years that I actually enjoyed meditating.

          But I do think that Nisargadatta was onto something. I was reading in ‘I Am That’ this morning and came across this passage, which struck me…

          “You have a mind which is spread in time. One after another all things happen to you and the memory remains. There is nothing wrong in it. The problem arises only when the memory of past pains and pleasures — which are essential to all organic life — remains as a reflex, dominating behaviour. This reflex takes the shape of ‘I’ and uses the body and the mind for its purposes, which are invariably in search for pleasure or flight from pain. When you recognize the ‘I’ as it is, a bundle of desires and fears, and the sense of ‘mine’, as embracing all things and people needed for the purpose of avoiding pain and securing pleasure, you will see that the ‘I’ and the ‘mine’ are false ideas, having no foundation in reality. Created by the mind, they rule their creator as long as it takes them to be true; when questioned, they dissolve.

          The ‘I’ and ‘mine’, having no existence in themselves, need a support which they find in the body. The body becomes their point of reference. When you talk of ‘my’ husband and ‘my’ children, you mean the body’s husband and the body’s children. Give up the idea of being the body and face the question: Who am I? At once a process will be set in motion which will bring back reality, or, rather, will take the mind to reality. Only, you must not be afraid.”
          (Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj)

          You know how something written sometimes rings a bell of recognition in your heart, as if you’ve always known it is true?

      • satchit says:

        “For me, being aware seems to have something to do with tempo and activity. If I am trying to do things quickly, I often get dragged along by my thoughts, whereas when I am sitting or laying down it is easier to be relaxed and slow and aware.”

        Who is practising?
        And why?

        • Lokesh says:

          Stop making use of your mind and see what happens.

        • Nityaprem says:

          It sounds like you are being dragged into ‘Advaita speak’, Satchit, it’s something to be aware of. There is a series of verbal tricks used by some fake Advaita teachers to embarrass people in Satsang, a pattern of speech that is easily learned by anyone. It’s not particularly clever or worthwhile once you’ve seen it in operation once…

          • satchit says:

            NP, you seem to be spiritually erudite.
            They were just simple questions.
            Advaita, what is this?

            Fact is, people who are frustrated in this world want easily to be somebody in the other world.

            The pattern has not changed.

            • Nityaprem says:

              Advaita Vedanta means the ‘non-dual conclusion of the Vedas’ and it’s a spiritual stream coming from Hinduism. It’s concerned with the thought that all is one, although it’s bad form to mention ‘one’ because for there to be one there has to be a second, therefore it is called not-two or nondualism.

              Its proponents when asked a question often reply “who is asking?” pointing to the fact that there is no person speaking because all is one. Read one of Tony Parsons’ books and you’ll quickly get the gist of how their conversations go. It’s interesting at first but quickly gets tiresome.

              • satchit says:

                I guess it is a method.
                And every method becomes sooner or later tiresome. Is it not?

                • Nityaprem says:

                  Not necessarily… quite a few Buddhist meditations have as goal to quiet the mind, which means they are meant to be continued for years.

                  The ‘tiresomeness’ is just another mental hindrance to meditation, a protest by the mind which does not go easily.

                • satchit says:

                  “goal to quiet the mind”

                  I doubt that this functions. At the most you can suppress it.

                  If there is a goal, the result is frustration or tiresomeness, in the outer world and in the inner world.

                  Can you meditate without a goal?

                • Nityaprem says:

                  If that is your fancy. You can try ‘shikantaza’ or ‘just sitting’ which is Zen meditation.

                  I really like sitting and being aware of my sense of being. Or to put it another way, just to Be.

                  These were all really good pointers for me.

            • Nityaprem says:

              Satchit said, “Fact is, people who are frustrated in this world want easily to be somebody in the other world.”

              This just leads to spiritual bypassing, using spirituality to avoid problems in the normal world. In fact, people would be better advised to practise letting go of the mind, and spend time with their sense of being. Just a short meditation, five minutes a day, is enough.

  9. Nityaprem says:

    Coming back to Deva Uma’s story, I find it beautiful that while she doesn’t mention the effect that rest and quiet had on her spiritual path, she did spend five years as a Buddhist nun in a hermitage, which does tend to bring you to stillness. It must be quite a contrast to now, living in north London with a husband and three kids, which sounds to me like a busy life.

    I had my own period of stillness studying Buddhism along Holland’s North Sea coast, where I had a little apartment on the fourth floor overlooking the beach. I spent years there in relative isolation, quietly reading Dhamma talks and meditating. I found it rejuvenating, it brought me back to myself after a long period of work-focussed life in England which was starting to strain my physical and mental health, and had taken my mind away from the spiritual.

    It’s funny how life has these floods and ebbs in energy, periods of abundant activity and lying fallow. If you take a path of non-resistance and just go along with the cues that life gives you, things tend to come to you when you need them. Trusting in existence, as Osho did say.

    • Lokesh says:

      Cool post, NP. I just copy and pasted it into the manuscript for the new SN book. Fame at last…

      • Nityaprem says:

        Aha, thanks, Lokesh!

        I was thinking of doing a little writing of my own, a kind of final word on everything I’ve learnt over my years of playing and making games. But I’m looking after the elderly this afternoon, so no real opportunity to get focussed on the keyboard.

        I must’ve written ten or more book concepts before I decided on actually doing this one. It’s funny how you learn, from concepts which give you very little freedom to express yourself to those which give you a lot of freedom.

  10. Nityaprem says:

    Deva Uma said, “In 2008, I met my husband for the first time, while attending a talk by a famous Advaita teacher in Hampstead.”

    It seems a lot of sannyasins caught the wave of Advaita Vedanta which swept through, and is continuing to move through in the enduring popularity of people like Mooji and Gangaji and the rest. I think it is not a bad thing, when I look at Ramana Maharshi’s photographs a very special energy reaches me, and then I remember his quote,

    “Whatever is destined not to happen will not happen, try as you may. Whatever is destined to happen will happen, do what you may to prevent it. This is certain. The best course, therefore, is to remain silent.”

    We spend so much time and energy in a struggle to avoid discomfort and gain comfort and convenience, while in fact endurance may be the wiser course. Ultimately there is very little that we really need, one might pare the list down to shelter, food and clothes. It is the mind that convinces us that we need a Christmas tree, and all sorts of baubles to hang in it.

    I recall spending a summer’s holiday at The Master’s Press in the outskirts of Florence, Italy, in the years not long after the Ranch wrapped up. It was a little publishing house run by sannyasins doing all kinds of illustrated books, based in a big somewhat run-down villa where people slept and worked for a place to stay, food and a very little pocket money. They made beautiful books though. Wonderful summers showing you didn’t need much to enjoy life, wandering through the market, sunning ourselves atop the chicken coop.

    If life gives you the time to meditate, to be silent in your sense of being, then that is all you truly need.

    • satchit says:

      “Ultimately there is very little that we really need, one might pare the list down to shelter, food and clothes. It is the mind that convinces us that we need a Christmas tree, and all sorts of baubles to hang in it.”

      Seems you are still in love with this dry zen style: Nobody needs anything. Water and bread is enough.

      A Christmas tree is fine if you have kids. It can create a kind of magic.

      And life has very much magic.

      • satyadeva says:

        I agree on this one, Satchit. At this dark, dreary time of year here in the UK my spirits are lifted by the occasional Christmas tree and coloured lights inside and outside people’s homes. Conveying warmth and good cheer amidst the winter gloom. It’s all a perfectly natural response to the conditions, a tradition of celebration stretching way back beyond the birth of Christ.

  11. teema says:

    Beloved Ma Deva Uma:

    What a wonderful life you have lived thus far. In many ways you are like a mystic rose. In the beginning you were just a bud, closed to the world, not fully yourself yet, not fully actualized. Protected in one sense, trapped in another. Then you found your Spring in Bhagwan’s truth and love, and it so moved you that you began to blossom. And however that happened, however that looked, it was all you, and there’s no judgment there, it was exactly what you needed at the time. But Winter came, your petals fell and your roots dug deep, and now in this new Spring you find yourself in, with husband and children, a new rose has blossomed – different rose, same rose bush, and this new rose is once more enjoyed by all around you, cherished and beloved.

    Your life sounds exciting, it sounds adventurous, it sounds full, and it sounds like the sort of experience many wish they could have, if only they could have the strength that you had to give it a chance.

    What a fantastic thing it must be for your children to have a mother who is so travelled, so experienced, and so open to new ideas and adventures. Because when they are older, they can truly look to you for guidance and opinion – and you can speak from a place of real knowledge, real lived experience, and that means so much.

    Thank you for sharing. ♥

  12. Lokesh says:

    Here in Spain, the Spaniards do not make a big deal out of Christmas. They celebrate the arrival of the three wise guys in early January.

    Since my grandson grew up, Christmas has meant very little to me. Christmas Day will be spent at a friend’s house where about 30 people will attend. It is always a special day because of the good vibes around the outdoor fire, with much singing of Beatles songs and jamming from local musicians. I like to play harmonica and do a good solo for The Stones’ ‘You gotta move’:
    “You gotta move
    You gotta move
    You gotta move, child
    You gotta move
    Oh, when the Lord get ready
    You gotta move.”

    • Nityaprem says:

      I am spending Christmas with my mother and stepfather at my aunt’s house where there will be a traditional lunch and maybe a few small gifts, there will be music and of course her dog will want much playing with his blanket. It should be a good day for everybody.

      My father is off in the Canaries with his girlfriend for two weeks, so I won’t be seeing him until sometime after the holidays. He usually does this, mostly for her sake because she needs a good break from her busy work life.

    • Nityaprem says:

      Did you have a good time on your Christmas Day outing, Lokesh?

      I had fun at my aunt’s, going there with my mother and stepfather. She had laid out a great spread of muffins, hearty pastries, steamed pears, shrimp croquettes, a mackerel salad, all kinds of sauces. It was delicious, a real feast. Later in the afternoon my aunt’s daughter showed up, with her husband and children, it was a real family gathering.

  13. Lokesh says:

    I had a wonderful afternoon surrounded by many friends. More food than you could wave a stick at. The sun went down and the moon came up. Thirty people were sitting around a massive fire bowl. Guitars and drums and much singing of old favourite songs, my favourite of which was Donovan’s ‘Season of the Witch’.

    I attend this event every year and it always inspires me with a strong sense of community. People of all shapes and sizes. There was even a stoned rabbi with a long beard. A real people from Ibiza happening. Few places in the world can create such a special vibe. Amazing!

  14. Nityaprem says:

    “Your questions are like a thorn stuck in your foot. My answers are like a second thorn with which to remove the first. But after the removal, don’t keep my answers, that may create trouble for you. Throw both your question and my answer away.”

    (Osho, ‘Tao The Three Treasures’)

    This just made me laugh…all the Osho quotes we have collected here are apparently in vain, only a source of trouble. I guess first you listen, then forget the discourse and find you just retain the attitude of sannyas.

    I have been thinking about it all day, and getting a few reminders that filling the mind with spiritual books has limits as an approach, if you don’t want to end up as a spiritual intellectual. Which was never my intention.

    • satchit says:

      “Your questions are like a thorn stuck in your foot. My answers are like a second thorn with which to remove the first. But after the removal, don’t keep my answers, that may create trouble for you. Throw both your question and my answer away.”

      (Osho, ‘Tao The Three Treasures’)

      He said similar things re the master-disciple relationship too. A master is like a thorn with whom to remove the thorn in the disciple. After the removal throw the master’s thorn too.

  15. Lokesh says:

    Periodically, over the years, Shanti has to bang a drum for Osho and his Rolls Royce collection. According to Shanti this was a device created by Osho to get rid of those unworthy of his teachings. Of course, holier-than-thou Shanti got the message while those less worthy did not, which amounts to just about everyone. This amounts to pure bullshit and I will explain why.

    Shanti says, “Osho used various devices at various points in time.” Yes, I agree. The key word here is ‘time’. When Osho delivered his Rolls Royce device number very few were privy to what was going on behind the scenes. Years passed, Osho died and the truth began to emerge.

    Osho’s fascination with the British car maker’s luxury limousines never bothered me at the time, one way or another. It was just another crazy chapter in Osho’s crazy life. It was amusing. During Osho’s silent period in Oregon, he spent sometimes hours on the phone with Rolls Royce dealers ordering up the latest bells and whistles for his newest four-wheeled acquisition. What had that to do with scaring off the unworthy? Nothing. Sheela was freaking out about empty coffers due to Osho’s overindulgence in his desire for expensive playthings. Meanwhile, street people are being imported into the commune due to a need to manipulate a regional ballot. Hardly the time to get rid of unworthy sannyasins, especially American ones now, was it?

    In fact, the emphasis was on attracting more community members and wealthy visitors to boost revenue. Whether they were worthy or not of Osho’s teachings was beside the point. Rich seekers had the red carpet rolled out for them. Penniless beggars were not the kind of people needed to boost revenue or hardly capable of absorbing Osho’s message. Yet they were welcomed to the show…because they were useful.


    Shanti says, “Osho knew that Rajneeshpuram would collapse and accepted the Rolls as gifts, as he knew that they could be sold and they would need more money in the future for the new commune project when the time came to leave the US.” More bullshit. Those cars were sold off dirt cheap and brought in hardly any money at all. Peanuts. Most of those cars were bought with commune funds and were not gifts, even though Osho made out like they were.

    Osho declares, concerning his luxury car collection, “It is part of my whole device to change the very structure of human consciousness.”
    Really, man, if you believe that nonsense you are capable of believing anything.

    Osho goes on to say, “I wanted to make it clear to you that you would be ready to drop all your desires for truth, for love, for spiritual growth to have a Rolls Royce. I was knowingly creating a situation in which you would feel jealous. The function of a master is very strange. He has to help you come to an understanding of your inner structure of consciousness: it is full of jealousy.”

    I have to laugh at the audacity of Osho’s words. I do not think many sannyasin felt jealous about Osho’s car collection, including myself. Most were happy to see him driving by in a Roller. Watch a vid of Osho driving by in Oregon. Do you see jealousy present on anyone’s face? No, you don’t. You see joy.

    What a fox! Makes me think of Orwell’s ‘doublespeak’. These days they call it ‘spin’, the way in which political parties try to present everything they do in a positive way to the public and the media. After all, an Indian Guru coming to America and getting carried away with his love of luxury cars looks daft. Remember, Osho grew up in India, where the Maharaja always had a Rolls Royce. But Osho was not stupid so he turned the whole carry-on into a device for our awakening…it looks better for a start. And, ultimately, it was a device to awaken people. Perhaps not in the way one might suppose.

    In Shanti’s case waking up to the fact that he is willing to believe anything said by an authoritarian figure of his choosing. Shanti will probably label me as being ‘Anti-Osho’ for saying this, but I am not at all anti-Osho. I thought he was a wonderful man with a marvellous sense of humour, who loved to tell ridiculous jokes. And that is what Osho’s cover-up for collecting Rolls Royces turned into. A device for our awakening! What a ridiculous joke about people’s stupidity. Anyone who takes all that nonsense seriously needs a check-up from the neck up.

    • swamishanti says:

      Some people never got past the Rolls Royce’s.
      I know the Rollers are a big problem for you, Lokesh. You wish that Osho would have stayed with the simple style robe of Pune One and the bald head.

      That is how they worked as a device. And some people left or were not interested. Clearing space always helped Oshos work.

      But if he had not done that then he would have been worshipped by millions and socially respectable.

      “ I have found freedom in dropping being respectable. Respectability is a social strategy to keep you imprisoned.” ‘From Death to Deathlessness’.

      Osho didn’t want to leave an organised religion behind him, yet he already had some enlightened sannyasins before he even got to the Ranch.

      That was his real work, helping people to wake up, he knew he would leave some enlightened ones behind him, a lineage, several lines, that’s what he came for, helping people to wake up, and he left some excellent talks.

      And if he had repeated the same old thing that everyone else had been doing, he would have remained part of the sheep flock, part of the past.

      Instead he made a point, that being enlightened didn’t mean you had to be a renounciate, to live accompanied with just a begging bowl or wearing just a simple nappy like Ramana Maharishi. You didn’t have to deny life.

      He demonstrated a full celebration of the material world as well as the spiritual, which is a radically new approach, also displaying a very transcendental sense of humour,
      with his disgusting joke with the Rolls Royce’s, which turned into a show of beautiful psychedelic colours, after Deva Peter began spray painting the cars which he did periodically, sprayed over each one again with a different style and enjoyed doing that.

      Osho knew that he was the beginning of something new.

      Yet no enlightened Master is likely to do anything like that with Rolls Royce’s again.

      Many people get stuck on the Rolls Royce’s.

      They were nothing to do with any Indian Maharaja. Osho had asked a sannyasin , whilst at the Castle, which was considered the most upmarket car, out of the Rolls and another car, I don’t remember which , in the US. The sannyasin told him it was the Rolls. Osho had something up his sleeve.

      Anando wrote that “ In the US, the religion is basically materialism. So he chooses a major symbol of capitalist greed, the Rolls Royce. And he encourages his sannyasins to buy a huge fleet of them..the media jump on this ,which is his point. “
      They are interested in Rolls Royce’s, not meditation or enlightenment. Her version, a pisstake of American consumerism which also attracts attention.

      Shanti says, “Osho knew that Rajneeshpuram would collapse and accepted the Rolls as gifts, as he knew that they could be sold and they would need more money in the future for the new commune project when the time came to leave the US.’ More bullshit. Those cars were sold off dirt cheap and brought in hardly any money at all. Peanuts.”

      I didn’t actually say that, I wrote that a less common idea with some is that he knew that after the collapse of the Ranch they would need to build a new commune and the money from the sale of the Rollers would contribute towards that.

      And they where not sold for peanuts but for millions of dollars.

      And I accept, that he knew that there would be a third commune, Osho mentioned that to someone in Poona One.

      • Lokesh says:

        Shanti says, “I know the Rollers are a big problem for you, Lokesh.”

        This leaves me wondering what part of “Osho’s fascination with the British car maker’s luxury limousines never bothered me at the time, one way or another” he does not understand.

        Or perhaps it is inconvenient for him that an alternative view is being offered that makes more sense than his dyed-in-the-wool Catholic sannyasin approach, wherein he is one of the chosen few who really understood Osho more than anyone else, a warped state of mind which requires the complete abandonment of common sense and one’s critical faculties. I rest my case.

        A Dallas auto dealer, Bob Roethlisberger, offered a reported $6 million for Osho’s RR collection. Considering how much was spent on the RRs, over $10 million and the Ranch, over $130 million, $6 million is indeed peanuts.

        • swamishanti says:

          ‘Catholic sannyasin’ – a term that doesn’t really mean anything in particular but has been used on this forum in a derogatory way whenever old-time sannyasins who are still into Osho appear.

          I don’t think your ‘alternative view’ makes any sense to me at all. You were not there at the time and , the Rolls Royce’s still bother you and you want to tell Osho off about it. He wasn’t following your rules.
          You have some interest, some passion for cars yourself , as you indicated in a comment about a particular Mercedes which you saw and liked the look of and managed to get later in life. Deep down, perhaps there maybe some jealousy in you.

          Only an idiot would think that Osho was really interested in having so many of that car. He said “they are for the idiots.”

          The beauty of Osho as a Master is that he had this tremendous enlightened presence but he also really helped people to think for themselves, took them right out of the cultish sheep mind of the society and some of the rubbish of the organised religions of the past.

          Of course, some of those still in the cult, in the sheep mind, want to pull him down everywhere and he is an offence to some Roman Catholics with the pea-sized brain and the unenlightened spirituality.

          But again he loved being provacative.

          So, inspired by Osho we have many sannyasins with a good sense of humour and playfulness but with different takes and ideas on things.

          And a freedom which many of those still with the sheep brain don’t have.

          • swamishanti says:

            Someone has attempted to edit my comment second to last. And taken out parts. Which I have now corrected. Although it is not written as well as the original as I can’t remember exactly how I put it.

            This is getting ridiculously and the idea of making another book out of comments of which some have been edited or deleted is equally ridiculous.

        • Nityaprem says:

          As far as the ownership of the Rolls-Royce collection is concerned, I can clear that up. The Rolls-Royces were administered as a separate fund which people could invest in. The cars were owned by the fund and were eventually sold at a small profit when Osho no longer needed them.

          I happen to know this because my father invested in the fund at the time we were at the Ranch. Many years later he received a statement and his money back plus a small profit when the fund was fully liquidated.

      • VeetTom says:

        One of the traditional Indian Gurus once spoke about the huge amount of oranges around his throne, where people walked by to offer their religious bowing downs and typical donations in the form of massive amounts of oranges. Such a Guru will show a certain kind of friendly receptivity and in return offer some sort of transmutation for that symbolic gift of an orange.

        Sannyasins had higher worldly possibilities and self-esteam for the same ritual. Osho fuelled that type offering Rolls Royce cars to raise the energies of those who donated them.
        Traditionally that may be a Karma thing or a spiritual commutation (?)
        Gifts are changed as a part of the flow ~~~

    • satchit says:

      Lokesh declares:

      “What a fox! Makes me think of Orwell’s ‘doublespeak’. These days they call it ‘spin’, the way in which political parties try to present everything they do in a positive way to the public and the media. After all, an Indian Guru coming to America and getting carried away with his love of luxury cars looks daft. Remember, Osho grew up in India, where the Maharaja always had a Rolls Royce. But Osho was not stupid so he turned the whole carry-on into a device for our awakening…it looks better for a start. And, ultimately, it was a device to awaken people. Perhaps not in the way one might suppose.”

      Hm, sounds as if you feel cheated by him?

      • Lokesh says:

        Satchit, why does it sound like I feel cheated by Osho?
        He never asked me for anything and gave me so much.

        • satchit says:

          Lokesh, more or less you say Osho was not honest. “Carried away with his love of luxury cars” means he was a victim of his desires. Not?

          But if he was a victim of his desires, he was certainly not enlightened.

          If you ask me the Rollers were just a message that one can be enlightened in luxury. No need to live in a cave.

          • Lokesh says:

            Satchit, as you well know, I am not very impressed by you or anything you have to say. That said, I will respond to your comments addressed to me.

            You say, “ “Carried away with his love of luxury cars” means he was a victim of his desires. Not?” Carried away means overenthusiastic. I never said anything about Osho being a victim of his desires.

            You go on to say, “But if he was a victim of his desires, he was certainly not enlightened.” I have no idea if Osho was enlightened or not. It does not concern me. Again you come away with this “victim of his desires” idea. I am certain Osho had personal desires, which does not mean he was a victim of them, which sounds like some form of Buddhist speak.
            You conclude by saying, “If you ask me the Rollers were just a message that one can be enlightened in luxury. No need to live in a cave.”

            But I did not ask you and for a very good reason. Your take on things is simplistic and lacks much on the level of insight. “A message that one can be enlightened in luxury.” Really, man, how old are you? Twelve?

            In the early days, Osho began to be interested in Rolls Royces due to his acute back problems. He liked a certain model because he could sit comfortably in it. Money started happening and Osho became a RR collector. A bit unseemly for a guru, who is supposed to be beyond it all viewed by traditional thinking, so Osho said his gas guzzlers were a device for his disciples’ awakening. It was stretching it a bit, but obviously, a lot of Osho’s disciples went for the far-fetched idea….more comfortable than having to accept that their master was a petrolhead.

            Ultimately, I do see that the whole crazy story might have indeed woken some people up to how gullible they are and willing to swallow any old nonsense served up to them by their authoritarian figure of choice…in this case Osho.

            • satchit says:

              Very funny, Lokesh.

              You don’t know if Osho was enlightened or not.
              But you know that he was a petrolhead.

              Seems you have lost trust in Him, now you believe your opinion.

              When did it happen?

            • Nityaprem says:

              To be honest, I never really considered before why Osho would have 93 Rolls-Royces. I just kind of accepted the fact that he had them. Thinking on it now, it was most likely a desire to collect.

              A normal person might have a collection of DVDs, or silver spoons, but I think what Osho did with books and Rolls-Royces shows he wasn’t particularly immune to this urge.

              Papaji once said, “Desire is the disease of the mind; live without it and be happy.”

              • swamishanti says:

                It was not a desire to collect, NP.

                Osho was a very intelligent man and only a fool would want to collect exactly the same model of car , RR Silver Spur over and over again. If he really had that kind of desire he would have wanted to collect different things, new vehicles.

                I have heard he used to eat exactly the same meal every day.

                • Lokesh says:

                  Osho liked that particular model of RR because it was the only car that did not hurt his back to sit in it.

                • Nityaprem says:

                  Any other reason makes even less sense. If you look at other gurus many choose to live in humble surroundings, while Osho liked marble, diamond watches and many Rolls-Royces.

                • satchit says:

                  “because it was the only car that did not hurt his back to sit in it.”

                  Here one sees again how stupid the writer is.

                  If it would be because of his back, one or two would be enough.

                  There is no need for 93 RRs.

                • Lokesh says:

                  During his time in the USA, Sheela claimed Osho began ordering a Big Mac with a double portion of fries every Sunday for lunch. The burger and chips were flown in by helicopter from Portland, which added a whole new slant to the term ‘fast food’.

                  Around this time, Osho’s favourite Corniche received some serious modifications: bullet-proof panels and tyres were added; jewels adorned the interior; a TV, VCR and telephone were installed; and tear-gas canisters and gun and grenade compartments were thrown in plus an anti-aircraft rocket launcher was concealed in the boot, just in case. The Corniche even got the stretch treatment, transforming it from a sporty two-door into a limousine fit for a guru who went to extraordinary lengths to create psychological devices to awaken his disciples.

                • Chinmayo says:

                  I suppose the RRs were to serve as a marketing device, and as a barrier for those who who didn’t have enough “calories” to see past them. You were to either love him madly or hate him dearly, there was to be no middle ground.

                  Now the question is, did it work?

                • Lokesh says:

                  Chinmayo enquires if Osho’s so-called Rolls Royce device worked.

                  I suppose that depends on who you put the question to.
                  It did not work on me. I never cared one way or another what car Osho drove, or how many he had at his disposal.

                  How about you, Chinmayo, did it work on you?

              • Chinmayo says:

                Answering Lokesh:

                It didn’t affect me either, as I’m not interested in cars and possessions. But I know of many who know him because of the RRs, even if they know nothing else of him.

                For example, my attention was initially grabbed with the tantra and sex, yet it was not what I fell in love with. I don’t know if I’d have found him otherwise.

                From my point of view he was a master in attention economics, decades before the term was coined. Just to provide one point of view!

                • Lokesh says:

                  Cool, Chinmayo, thanks for your response.
                  SN needs people like you. People who respond to comments directed their way, instead of running on a monologue. Please stay around.

                • Chinmayo says:

                  Thank you for your kind words, I’ll try. I recently met two old Osho sannyasins, and was immediately brought back after a long hiatus.

                • Lokesh says:

                  Yeah, I know what you mean. It comes and goes. I just finished putting together the second Sannyas News book and it tuned me into channel Osho for the umpteenth time.

      • swamishanti says:

        “In the new commune we are going to have seven concentric circles of people. The first, the most superficial circle, will consist of those who come only out of childish curiosity, or out of already accumulated prejudices, who are, deep down, antagonistic — the journalists, etcetera.

        They will be allowed only to see the superficial part of the commune – not that anything will be hidden, but just because of their approach they will not be able to see anything more than the most superficial. They will see only the garments. Here also the same goes on happening. They come and they see only the superficial…

        In the new commune, the first concentric circle will be for those who come like journalists — prejudiced people, who already know that they know. In short, for the fools.

        The second concentric circle will be for those who are inquirers — unprejudiced, neither Hindus nor Mohammedans nor Christians, who come without any conclusion, who come with an open mind.

        They will be able to see a little deeper. Something of the mysterious will stir their hearts. They will cross the barrier of the mind.

        They will become aware that something of immense importance is happening — what exactly it is they will not be able to figure out immediately, but they will become aware vaguely that something of value IS happening. They may not be courageous enough to participate in it; their inquiry may be more intellectual than existential, they may not be able to become part, but they will become aware — of course, in a very vague and confused way, but certainly aware — that something more is going on than is apparent.

        The third circle will be for those who are sympathetic, who are in deep sympathy, who are ready to move with the commune a little bit, who are ready to dance and sing and participate, who are not only inquirers but are ready to change themselves if the inquiry requires it. They will become aware more clearly of deeper realms.

        And the fourth will be the empathic. Sympathy means one is friendly, one is not antagonistic. Empathy means one is not only friendly; one feels a kind of unity, oneness. Empathy means one feels with the commune, with the people, with what is happening. One meets, merges, melts, becomes one.

        The fifth circle will be of the initiates, the sannyasins – one who is not only feeling in his heart but who is ready to be committed, to be involved. One who is ready to risk. One who is ready to commit, because he feels a great, mad love — mad, mad love — arising in him. The sannyasin, the initiate.

        And the sixth will be of those who have started arriving — the adepts. Those whose journey is coming closer to the end, who are no longer sannyasins only but are becoming siddhas, whose journey is coming to a full stop, is getting closer and closer to the conclusion. The home is not far away, a few steps more. In a way, they have already arrived.
        And the seventh circle will consist of arhatas and boshisattvas. The arhatas are those sannyasins who have arrived but are not interested in helping others to arrive. Buddhism has a special name for them: arhata – the lonely traveler who arrives and then disappears into the ultimate. And the bodhisattvas are those who have arrived but they feel a great compassion for those who have not yet arrived. The bodhisattva is an arhata with compassion. He holds on, goes on looking back and goes on calling forth those who are still stumbling in darkness. He is a helper, a servant of humanity.

        There are two types of people. The one who is at ease only when he is alone; he feels a little uncomfortable in relationship, he feels a little disturbed, distracted, in relationship. That type of person becomes an arhata. When he has arrived, he is finished with everything. Now he does not look back.

        The bodhisattva is the second type of person: one who feels at ease in relationship, in fact far more comfortable when he is relating than when he is alone. He leans more towards love. The arhata leans more towards meditation. The path of the arhata is of pure meditation, and the path of the bodhisattva is that of pure love. The pure love contains meditation, and the pure meditation contains love – but the pure meditation contains love only as a flavor, a perfume; it is not the central force in it. And the pure love contains meditation as a perfume; it is not the center of it.
        These two types exist in the world. The second type – the follower on the path of love – becomes a bodhisattva. The seventh circle will consist of arhatas and bodhisattvas.

        Now, the seventh circle will be aware of all the six other circles, and the sixth circle will be aware of the other five circles – the higher will be aware of the lower, but the lower will not be aware of the higher. The first circle will not be aware of anything other than the first circle. He will see the buildings and the hotel and the swimming pool and the shopping center and weaving and pottery and carpentry. He will see the trees, the whole landscape . . . he will see all these things. He will see thousands of sannyasins, and he will shrug his shoulders: “What are these people doing here?” He will be a little puzzled, because he was not thinking that so many mad people can be found in one place: “All are hypnotized!” He will find explanations.

        He will go perfectly satisfied that he has known the commune. He will not be aware of the higher – the lower cannot be aware of the higher. That is one of the fundamental laws of life – Aes dhammo sanantano – only the higher knows the lower, because he has passed from the lower.

        When you are standing on the sunlit mountain peak, you know everything down in the valley. The valley people may not be aware of you at all, it is not possible for them. The valley has its own occupations, its own problems. The valley is preoccupied with its own darkness.

        The fool can come to a master but will remain unbenefited because he will see only the outer. He will not be able to see the essential, he will not be able to see the core. The fool comes here too, but he listens only to the words and he goes on interpreting those words according to his own ideas. He goes perfectly satisfied that he knows what is happening.

        There are many fools who don’t come here – they don’t feel the need. They simply depend on other fools’ reports. That’s enough. Just one fool can convince thousands of fools, because their language is the same, their prejudices are the same, their conceptions are the same…there is no problem! One fool has seen, and all the other fools are convinced. One fool reports in the newspaper and all the other fools read it early in the morning, and are convinced.“

        (Osho, from ‘The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha’, Vol. 2, Discourse 7

        • Lokesh says:

          After reading Shanti’s above post, I am left with two distinct impressions. Osho had his sannyasins running around in circles and Shanti must surely be a Bodhisattva of the highest order. I mean to say, who else but a Bodhisattva could be bothered copy and pasting Osho’s words to the extent he does, knowing all the while that Osho repeated again and again that his real message was the space, the silence, between his words. So do not focus on the words that the Bodhisattva posts but rather the space behind them, which, in this case, is quite considerable.

          And never forget, the less people know, the more stubbornly they know it, and only silence communicates the truth as it is.

          • VeetTom says:

            Haha…who is closer to truth? Our most famous mind game.

            This famous Osho quote says it all.
            The beauty of Sannyas is to even understand the Buddha himself while Osho puts it all on the table. We surely know we are still running around like beginners and idiots but we can breathe the air of the peak simultaneously as well. That is his work we can see by his side. Crystal clean words still alive.

            Which is the Osho quote, please, Veet Tom?

  16. Lokesh says:

    If you check who has been online in the last six hours there is only you and me who have been online SN and it was not me who edited comments, Shanti. I could not be arsed with that. What kind of attempts were made to edit your comment?

    As for “The idea of making another book out of comments of which some have been edited or deleted is equally ridiculous”, you have already shared your negative ideas about this in a previous post. Why are you so negative about this? Is it because you were rattling on about doing a second SN book and never got it together? I do not blame you. It involves a lot of work. I have a couple of chapters already done. Don’t worry, there is not much in it based on your comments. I remember what a drama queen you became over the first book and I have no desire for a repeat performance. Only thing I have to add is the second book will be better than the first.

    • swamishanti says:

      I wasn’t accusing you of editing my comments, just pointing out what I just noticed, that some lines where taken out and had recently noticed that some other older comments were missing from before such as an exchange between yourself and Chetna from the loveosho podcasts where she tried to explain to you that she felt Osho’s presence, when you were going on about it being a fantasy. And imagination. You sometimes appear a bit of a foolish man because you are unwilling to learn from other sannyasins yet you want to hold onto Osho and imagine you are superior. Yet without very little experience at all of him at all. Only from Pune One.

      And I have just noticed just now that the part about Chetna has been edited out of this comment. 4th Third/Jan/ screenshot taken.
      How many comments have been edited or deleted isn’t clear.

      In case you’re wondering, Shanti, neither I nor anyone I know is responsible for this unwanted editing.

  17. Nityaprem says:

    I woke up this morning with a feeling of dissatisfaction with all things spiritual. It’s odd, because it has been my habit to do my meditation in the morning, and I often listen to a bit of Osho. But today I feel as if it’s all unsatisfactory, everything from Buddhism to Nisargadatta to Papaji is just no good.

    Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I only had one cup of coffee this morning. And I dreamt about an infestation of mice and hamsters and other rodents that I had to catch by hand. No sooner had I caught one than I would spot two more by the back door.

    Anyways…Happy New Year’s Eve. I fancy an oliebol.

    • Nityaprem says:

      I’ve decided to take a break from all spiritual activity for a while. This strong sense of dissatisfaction I felt carried with it a feeling of sameness, as if everything spiritual that I was reading was the same, that I had gone over it many times and I was literally sick of it.

      It’s very unusual for me to have a strong feeling like that, and even more so to wake up with it. It’s like I have filled myself to the brim with this material during ten years of study, and now those parts of me that are aware of my extended being are registering a protest, that this is not good for me on some level.

      Have you ever heard of Internal Family Systems (IFS)? It’s a kind of psychological approach to dealing with yourself as if you were a family of parts. I may do some reading into that.

      • Lokesh says:

        I think reading lots of spiritual books can be viewed as spiritual behaviour. Reading ‘I Am That’ is all very well, but unless one puts into practice what is being shared, rather than being seen as a spiritual activity it can be regarded as a complete waste of time.

        It is good to try and define in one’s thinking what ‘being spiritual’ actually means. I do not think reading lots of spiritual books is particularly spiritual. One is better off sitting under a tree, closing one’s eyes and doing absolutely nothing. The more one can disengage from thinking and enter into simply being, the more one will benefit.

        • Nityaprem says:

          ‘I Am That’ is a good book to get an overview, but because it is all separate satsang meetings there isn’t really one path you can point to. You can try and follow some of the most frequently mentioned advice, but that is about it.

          • Lokesh says:

            ‘I Am That’ functions like a mirror. It reflects the reader’s inner state. I find the teaching singular and unwavering.

            I suggest you return to it and remain open to being surprised. It is an extraordinary book. A true spiritual masterpiece.

      • satchit says:

        “I’ve decided to take a break from all spiritual activity for a while. This strong sense of dissatisfaction I felt carried with it a feeling of sameness, as if everything spiritual that I was reading was the same, that I had gone over it many times and I was literally sick of it.”

        Fact is, this can be résistance.
        So following the daily routine and not listening to the mind is also a possibility.

    • satchit says:

      The rodents in your dream are the gurus.
      You can not catch them because always new ones are coming.

  18. Lokesh says:

    Oliebols? Osho says that oliebols can help one attain olieboltenment. more quickly.

  19. Nityaprem says:

    I just read the first lecture in ‘Tantra: The Supreme Understanding’, and I have to say it struck me as a really good piece. Very much enjoyed it, thanks Ma Deva Uma.

  20. VeetTom says:

    Rolls…and me and my car.

    • VeetTom says:

      That pin-up photo above is from 2011.

      Just by chance, that Rolls parked in the yard of that media production where we produced ‘Osho Here & Now’ 12 times in just one year. I switched my car’s position and called it: ‘Me and my car’ Guess which one…Big Joke!

      The Rolls Royce was like that empty tree for early Buddhists – to many of us in those days – or like the empty chair for us.

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